Be Kind to Others...You Never Know When You Might Need a Kidney

This is a motto I think we all should live by...Think about it for a minute...you never know when you may need a kidney or blood transfusion or other body parts...so you better be nice to the person next to you!

I try...I mean I really try to be the person my dogs think I am...They are happy to see me when I walk in the door...from a long day away or just getting the mail...my dogs love me no matter if I am thin (I am so not) or not thin...they do not care if my hair or make up is done (usually not). They think I am the kind of person they just want to hang with...all the time...literally.

So that gets me thinking...am I really a nice person? I hope so, I mean I do not deliberately ever try to harm or hurt anyone or animals.  I do get angry at injustice and cruelty.  I do try to treat others as I would want to be treated...a person is a person...no one person starts out greater than another...I mean there are just some things ALL humans do the same, even Queen Elizabeth!  It is those pesky learned behaviors that get people off track most the time (crime, hate, greed, prejudice, conceit)...I get there is evil amongst us, but I think there are more angels.  My glass is half full.

I have thought for a long time, that this world would be a nicer place if every person on earth had to work in retail and be a waiter each for a month each of their lives...they see the good and the bad in all kinds of people. I will fess up to purposely tripping and spilling a glass of tea on a man who patted me on the touchy when I was a waitress...it was not nice...but what he did was not either...(Geez, I hate it when I hear my Mom's voice...'two wrongs don't make a right'.)  

I am perfectly flawed (above confession an example) as is every person I know and every person I do not know.  Perfection is over rated in us humans...no one will ever, ever achieve it.

Remember (and remind me too) to be kind...because you just never ever really know what you might need...down the road.

(This of course is my opinion.)

GRANDmothers..oh how I miss them - part deux

My Mema was an incredible lady, she was what one would call a Giver...putting others in front of herself, and took care of everyone.

Mema was the quintessential definition of a mid 20th century homemaker and thus the Grandmother everyone wanted.  She cooked (the worlds greatest to me) & cleaned (she ironed sheets) her house was always in order.  She was the first lady of their small town for awhile. She always had her hair done as most southern woman did and she had pointy long nails painted red.

My memories always start off with her saying "give me some sugar", because that is what Grandmothers from Arkansas say when they see their grandkids.   She was always quick with the hugs for my brothers and cousin.  We lived about 5 hours away, and would pack up (literally every nook and cranny) the car and head North to Arkansas for every holiday but Christmas and also during the summers.  I couldn't wait to get to that small town, they lived right off the square, so we were in the thick of it for years and since half the town were relatives, plenty cousins to play with!

Mema really was a great cook, I can picture her in the kitchen making something to bake, or cook or fry up in that blue paisley apron.  She had a built in mixer that popped up from a cabinet when needed, that was a cool toy for me.  She always had treats for us in the 3rd drawer that had a roll top. She knew how picky an eater I was and made a corner of her banana pudding without bananas for me, or make her potatoes lumpy just enough to my liking!  Her fried okra was a little piece of heaven.  Now one Thanksgiving, she made me eat sweet potatoes and lets just say they came right back up and ruined a lovely table setting.  I was never asked to try some different foods again.  I also remember sitting with her for hours shelling purple hull peas she had just gotten from the peddler on the square and having purple fingers!  According to my Mom, she and her sister never learned to cook from her as she didn't like anyone in HER kitchen, but it was different for me, she patiently taught and showed me how to cook.  

Getting back to Mema being a giver, she was the oldest of 10, and when her Mother (Big Mama to us) late in her life decided one day she wasn't going to anything else and have her daughters take care of her, Mema did.  I don't recall her actually being sick, I guess she was just tired!  Mema and most of her sisters took 24 hours shifts taking care of her/her house as well as also keeping their own homes in order. 

She also took care of my PaPa, she had dinner (which was at lunch to us) on the table and he would come home everyday to eat. She cooked him eggs, bacon, toast and her special oatmeal (which was really just not lumpy oatmeal) for breakfast and then made dinner and supper every day, as they rarely went out to dinner.   Later in life, his health deteriorated and she still took care of him, until she couldn't do it all by herself.  Then they got nurses to help but she was still taking care of him  I remember one time I was there in my 20's, when he didn't want to take his medicine for the nurses...she marched in there and said "Johnny you are going to take your medicine right now!" You can guess the outcome.  Kinda cute in my book.

Also we had dogs, so they always came with us when we visited, now she said  she didn't like dogs.  What she did not know is we used to catch her when she thought no one was looking petting and whispering to the dog...That would be something she would never admit too!

After my PaPa died, she didn't have anyone to take care of and I really think that was her life's work. It was time for those of us who loved her to take care of her.  This role reversal was not something she liked nor was comfortable with.  I remember about a year before she passed, I made a surprise visit to see her on my way back from a trip, she was sitting in her chair alone with the lights off.  After she recovered from the shock of seeing us, I asked her where her nurse was and she had sent them home and that she didn't need one.  She really did though.  Shortly after that visit she had to move into a live in facility as she needed full time care and could not get around (she had terrible feet...those I inherited).  Her eyes would light up when I would go to see her and I did as much as possible. She left us shortly after that.  She is in Heaven making banana-less banana pudding and I bet still petting the dogs when no one is looking.

My Aunt told me recently that I had a special relationship with her and Papa and that just made me smile and miss them a bit more.  You see it is an honor for me to be their grand daughter. 

I have in my own kitchen, a collage of some of her handwritten recipes to help me remember who taught me how to cook.

 

GRANDmothers..oh how I miss them

I have been thinking and missing my 2 Grandmothers lately.  One was my Gamma-the other my Mema (don't you hate how the oldest gets to name the Grandparents...obviously I'm not the oldest!). They were complete opposites and they both made a life long impact on me.  It was an honor to spend time with them, listen and learn from them.

Tonight I will introduce you to my Dad's Mother..(he always called her Mother...never Mom.)

My Gamma was simply a true and beautiful lady.
Gamma lived far away and so we didn't get to see her as much, but when we did, I couldn't get enough of her.  My memories focus on hair, her brushing my hair and me brushing hers...She had long beautiful hair that was always up in a bun. She would try to get my hair into one of her doughnut buns...but as the last post showed, I didn't always have enough hair, so it stuck out even after to 463 bobby pins stuck in my head.  But she did it so I wore (and slept in) it proudly. I really loved it when she would brush my hair.  She also introduced me to white chocolate covered potato chips and the soft drink Squirt..which I still love to this day.  I know I get my habit of collecting of family things from her, as she still had my Dad's letters, drawings, military papers and his elementary school report cards.  (From his grades, I found out bad grades were hereditary!)

My Gamma had such a beautiful handwriting and she would always write me back when I would write her...I still have some of her cards.
Penmanship was very important to her, she passed that onto my Dad, he didn't to me.  She told me a life lesson on one of her visits "that a lady only chews 1/2 piece of gum"...that advice still sticks with me.  Also one time my brother D and I were 'helping' her unpack and we didn't know she smoked and we found her ciggies and she was so embarrassed and shocked we found them, she probably had to go outside to have a smoke, when we weren't looking!

She was an actress early in her life, traveled around the country a bit.  This was in the early 1920's maybe late teens.  I have her diary from those travels and they are a hoot...and gives me an insight to her more.  She was very strong in her Catholic faith and her diary reflects that. She would put her rosary out on trees for good weather.  She had the most beautiful skin, so translucent even into her later years.  I hoped that I would inherit that skin (didn't happen). 

I recently found out from a couple of my cousins that early in my life I was her favorite.  It probably had more to do with being the only daughter of her number one son (who protected her in ways a son should never have to).  I never knew I was her favorite (I always thought it was another cousin).  My cousin also told me Gamma always got this special smile when she said Lori Ann...I of course cried...I get a special smile when I think of her as well.

I later was informed how hard her life was since she married my Gampa, it makes my proud to know how strong she was...she survived...Honestly I am kinda glad I didn't know how hard it was when I was a child, it would of broke my heart even more knowing.

I remember getting the call that she died in Nov, 1982, I don't remember who called, but just the words she died over night.  I cried...I cried selfishly knowing I would never see her, speak to her, write to her again in this world. Lord I still miss her, I could use a hair brushing from her now.

Less than a month later my Aunt D sent me an unsigned birthday card that she knew was for me, since my birthday was coming up. Yes, I still have it.

I realize I used the word beautiful many times here, but in my mind/memories that is the only word to describe her..
Beautiful

Copy Cat Haircuts of Famous...Yep I've done that..

Three times in my life I will admit to getting haircuts of famous people...The first one by accident, the other 2 on purpose. 

The first time I was 4 or 5...and I had long gorgeous blond hair..and I decided I wanted to cut Barbie's hair and mine!  I gave Barbie a beautiful only to my eyes pixie... which was famous in the mid 60's, and apparently I got bored half thru mine haircut, as I only cut one side...Now this is a vivid memory of mine...I walked into my parents bedroom and my Mom was on the phone and she screamed...I don't remember much after that, but the photos of me after that were of matching Barbie's pixie...but with one side sticking out a bit...

 The second time was the after 1976...I know that for sure as it was after the Winter Olympics..and yes if you were alive at that time, you will remember Dorothy Hamill's wedge...So thinking I would make myself even more awkward in my adolescence look like her too I got one...but with one side sticking out...(It would be later determined to be a cowlick)...and with my braces, it was not a good look!  

The last time was in the 90's...(I did get my haircut short in the 80's, but not because of a famous person, but because a curler melted in my hair).  I was so very convinced that if I got a Princess Di haircut I would look like her and snag my Prince Charming (this was when we all believe they were going to live happily ever after)...Well this one looked better, even presentable at times, as long as I put in the effort in styling it daily...It took way to much time in the morning, so most days no Princess Di look and no Prince Charming.

Lesson learned for me is that no matter hard I wanted to look like Barbie, Dorothy or Di, it would never ever, ever happen...

Head First...Could be Why I have a Headache.

Well so I have dived head first into this blog thang!!  
I am a wanna be Queen of me and my family, and I have never been known as a quiet kinda gal (some would say I ramble...but I don't).

So enjoy my thoughts, ideas, favorite things and my winding journey.